Well, I'll be!
For lunch, I took a brisk walk to the sundae shop a couple blocks down. It was only 12:30 pm, so I wasn't too hungry. As I waited in line, there was a fine, young thang standing ahead of me. Though it was mini-skirt weather outside, her short shorts were good enough for my eyes to ogle at. Trying to figure out how to begin a conversation with this lady, I just blurted out, "Excuse me, miss. Your knees are ashy." She dismissed my comment, and snapped her focus of attention away from me. I quickly apologized to her and offered to buy her an ice cream. Accepting my kind gesture, I began making the small talk. The wWhos. The whereabouts. The life and shit. Assuming that she was a college girl, I got to the question, "So, how old are you?" To my surprise, she was 16. Apparently, this child was either skipping school or she was a child actress who made enough money to the point where school was not a necessity for her. Not wanting to seem like a perverted, old man, I told her, "I know it's a nice day out, but you need to be in school with the rest of the children. Trust me. Just stay in school. And don't do drugs!" I paid for her ice cream and walked back to work, while silently praying for forgiveness for my lewd imagination, which wasn't as bad until I found out her age. On the way back, I felt like a super-hero. Changing the world, one person at a time.
Now, for the pissed off part. My fucking boss is a fucking piece of shit. I just had my quarterly review, and it was decided that I did not deserve a raise. It's complete bullshit. I understand I've made several passes at the better looking female employees, and that my TPS reports didn't always have the proper cover sheet, but that doesn't mean I can't get a raise. The fucking secretary got a raise, and every time I've checked her out, she's been painting her nails, or swinging her leg with her oh-so sexy stilettos hanging off of her toes, in that gray business skirt with the red glasses, looking too damn fine. I mean, she hasn't done much work, and she got a raise. Whatever. The point is that my boss needs to open his eyes before I open it for him, permanently. I'm tired of this weak ass pay. If I can't get a raise, at least make it legal for me to get a blow job each day from the female of my liking within the whole floor who cannot be selected for consecutive days. Is that too much to ask for?!
"Do it slow. Do it sexy. Do it deussimo.
No comments:
Post a Comment