Damn this stupid cell phone while driving prohibition.
Apparently, the law says that cops can use their phone while driving, but the regular citizen can't. How the hell am I supposed to report those stupid truckers that cut me off in the middle of the highway? Or the drunk teenager crossing the double yellow lines? If I pull over to make the call, I won't be able to read and remember the license plate. That must be it. (Truckers want you to get traffic tickets, so they put their "Report Their Driving" number on the back of their truck. Cops want to make sure truck drivers aren't getting reported. Trucks and cop cruisers must be plotting against the citizen driver.) My thoughts don't make any sense to me.
Besides, I want the right to drive and talk to my favorite phone sex operator like the rest of these officers. Surprisingly, phone sex while driving keeps me calm and helps me to avoid my own road rage. All in all, my driving is plenty safer. It would be better if I could get real sex while driving (or at least a blow job), but these women have been holding out on me since my birth. We need to get the universe controller to fix that glitch for me.
Peeps at work seem to think that I think I'm better than them. They must got some low self esteem or some kind of inferiority complexical syndrome for them to think that. That's why I likes to act stupid and ign'ant 'round those fuckers. It enablizes me to fit in with the rest of the crowd, and not feel like they dissing me behind my back and playing me out by calling me names like "The 'Thinks He's Better' Guy" or "Mr. Knows More Than Us About Working at this 9 to 5." If I ain't make attempts to be like the rest of them fools at work, my co-workers would think I'm wack, and that is something I just can't let happen. That's why I gots to blend in with the crowd and be the dumb, ign'ant fuck that I isn't. Or maybe that's already how I be...
Whoever said, "It's better to give than to receive," must have never received a blow job.
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