"Epic fail!!"
Some young girl at work called me an "epic fail." She continued to laugh in my face and spit at my feet because of the news around my job. Apparently, some dumb ass kid, who happens to be really close buddies with the big boss, was upgraded to be an authority figure above me. Somehow, a child, who has recently discovered what it's like to legally consume alcohol, not to mention that he also has only maintained a GED, while having no type of college education or experience, has excelled further than my non-ass-kissing ass. I'm pretty sure I am capable of handling his job with much more efficiency, but because he happens to be good buddies with the big boss, and because he doesn't know how to use a condom, he gets the upgrade in job and pay and shit. Some bullshit that is. Needless to say, I told that name-calling girl to shut her mouth before I stuff it with something small and hard, and she did, but a small, hard part of me really wished that she didn't.
I'm about to start processing babies, so I can have an excuse to move up on the corporate ladder and begin to slave drive under-valued employees like myself. To make matters worse, I paid for this kid's drinks a few months back, and this prick didn't even bother to give me the money he had promised when he "forgot to bring cash with him." I seriously want to pee on his child.
I guess that's life. And in celebration of life, I'm going to play with my ding-a-ling, and watch my wastes of life dry themselves up on the wall of shame that stands in front of me.
On a brighter note, a female accepted my offer to dinner and a movie. Unfortunately, she changed her mind when she saw how surprised I was that she accepted my kind gesture, but I guess that's life. And in celebration, I will be touching myself, daydreaming of what should have been, while listening to some Celine Dion.
It should be an interesting evening.
I'm a creep. I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here?
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